12 Wonders From The Past That Post-Modernity Has Stolen From Us

 
I was a high school kid in the early ‘80s when the term “digital” gained traction in the public headspace. I specifically remember the very moment I learned what the term meant relative to the analog nature of, well…everything in life up to that point.

As naïve as I may have been, I wondered then what life would be like when everything was reduced to simple ones and zeros. Wouldn’t it all be so finely-calculated to the point of being hyper-sanitary…and boring?

As it turned out, my simple teenage mind was prescient in many ways. In the rush toward digital everything, plenty of what made life interesting—and arguably better—has been lost, probably forever.

Realistically speaking, plenty of what I’m about to throw on the table happened long before “my day”. As such, my intent isn’t to sound curmudgeonly. It’s just that with technology moving at such breakneck speed toward The Singularity, I haven’t seen much written about what we’ve sacrificed along the way as collateral damage.

 
Rise Above Today's Tension Between Men And Women, With Better Relationships In Mind

 

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15 Things No Man Should EVER Say

 
Scot and EmilyMost of my online research on the subject du jour uncovered articles by angry women whose baseline vitriol toward men was barely concealed under the surface. Predictably, the vast majority were specifically about what men should never say to women in particular.

I found myself reading enduring endless rants over purely innocent, and in many cases ostensibly innocuous (e.g. “you look beautiful tonight”) alleged mistakes by men who meant well, it’s just that they were apparently ill-equipped to read angry women’s minds Said angry women, in turn not able to read men’s minds, therefore assumed the worst, of course.

Yeah, well…if you’re at all worried this is going to be that kind of post, save your brain cells. I’m not an angry woman, nor have I been hanging out with any lately who could theoretically influence my thoughts.

Rather, this is a man-to-man post with the well-meaning brotherly intention of saving guys from clearly demonstrating they have zero skill with women whatsoever.

That means I’ll be sparing you any semblance of politically correct regurgitation, including but not limited to “dog-whistling” or “virtue signalling”. That said, I make no apologies for “triggering” anyone. After all, Job One here is watching out for your best interests as a man who loves women.

So let’s get on with it, already.

And by the way, I’m not limiting the list to what we should never say to women per se. What follows is a more pure rendering of what should never be said by a man period.

 
Rise Above Today's Challenges To Relationships Between Men And Women

 

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How To Be Everyone’s Favorite Person…Instantly

 
Why Are Promises So Hard To Keep?By now you’ve figured out that I don’t make unreasonable “easy button” claims.

But here is one of those exceptionally rare truths that isn’t only going to add ridiculous, off-the-chain value to your life, it’s also as simple as flipping a switch:

Be a man or a woman who does what you say you’re going to do.

Boom. Like I said, it’s not at all complicated or difficult to implement. There’s no learned skill. The only thing to remember is one’s own promise.

What we’re talking about here is nothing short of a cornerstone to character. Here in Texas where I live, keeping one’s word is perhaps treasured more than other places.

But there’s little doubt that the rare human being who makes promises and keeps them is beloved by all, regardless of geography. Man…life is SO much easier and more joyful when we have the pleasure of interacting with such high-end people.

Yet, so few people actually do what they say they’re going to do. Especially in California, I’ve noticed…ha!

Why is that?

 
X-Ray Vision Into A Woman's Deepest Fantasies

 

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8 Surefire Ways To Tell: Are You A Fun Person?

 
Why Should India Have All The FunAstonishingly, there’s very little on the web addressing the topic du jour. Mostly, it’s a few quiz sites asking pretty random questions that carry the personal assumptions of whoever authored them. There’s nothing really, well, helpful or definitive there.

So then, given how absolutely crucial being fun is to the attraction process, let alone building a healthy and vibrant social circle, I decided to go ahead and let the fur fly (or the powder, if you were in India earlier this month).

What do you say we let the fun begin? Right on…

Like everyone tends to believe that they have a sense of humor, everyone also typically thinks of him or herself as a fun person. After all, how much of a true “stick in the mud” does one have to be to self-identify as “no fun”?

A sense of humor is rare enough, so what about a sense of fun? Do you have one? There’s no irony in the fact that both of those factors are directly related. That could be why there are as few truly FUN people as there are folks with a sense of humor. Just sayin’.

Part of the problem, I think, is that people don’t recognize fun when they’re potentially heading for it, or even in the midst of it.

I mean, what IS “fun”, and should it be a priority or not?

So much of how you might answer that question for yourself is based on personality and mindset, for sure. But hey…the weird twist there is that even people who aren’t any fun tend to recognize when others ARE. Weird, right?

It’s all too easy to lapse into the philosophical or psychological factors at play here, isn’t it? But that wouldn’t be any fun!

So on with it. Here are 8 factors that pretty much tell the tale of whether you’re a FUN person or not:

 
X-Ray Vision Into A Woman's Deepest Fantasies

 

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Why Approaching Women Is So Puzzling

 
Putting The Pieces TogetherWe’ve done ourselves a disservice by assuming that each situation where we’re approaching a woman is going to be identical to any other.

But who can really blame us? It seems as if everything we’ve ever read on the subject prepares us for interactions with beautiful but bitchy women, who are typically saturated with “bothersome” male attention and are therefore eager to reject us.

Well, it’s time to tell the truth, once and for all.

The bold reality is that whenever you approach a woman, you’ve got a puzzle to figure out.

And each given scenario will have a unique solution because each woman is different.

In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that if you somehow have fallen into a pattern of encountering ONLY bitchy women who are eager to reject you, the solution might just involve looking in the mirror.

For what it’s worth, that’s good news. That means the future is under your control.

Remember, women follow your lead. Anytime you’re confronted with the same negative reaction repeatedly, the only conclusion that can reasonably be drawn is that you’ve somehow led.

I realize that isn’t easy to hear. Nevertheless, it should empower you. Here’s why.

 
Meeting Women Is Not A Crime

 

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If It’s Not Fast, It’s Only Half-Fast: 5 1/2 Situations With Women That Call For Speed

 
Half an ass, half-fastGo ahead. Say the first part of the subject line out loud. Do it briskly enough so you can hear what’s REALLY being said.

In other words, don’t give it a half-fast effort.

So gentlemen, what does a clever motorsports phrase like that have to do with women?

Well, I’m about to pull the blanket off of one of The Most Interesting Man’s more infamous pronouncements: “I assure you, most women would not consider speed a virtue.”

Now, while I wholeheartedly agree with that statement in context (speed dating)—as well as in the bedroom and during the whole seduction “dance”, for example—I’m convinced that there are absolutely other times where if you’re slow on the draw you’re going to LOSE, big time.

Here are my five (and a half) situations where you’d better be fast, lest you be half-fast:

 
X-Ray Vision Into A Woman's Deepest Fantasies

 

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Will You Pass The “Interesting Test”?

 
Emily Being InterestingBy now you know that a man who leads an interesting life replete with way cool and exhilarating activities stands a much better chance of attracting desirable women than a guy who spends most of his time on the couch watching the tube and eating Cheetos.

This is much to the chagrin of probably 75% of all men out there, apparently. My inbox is stuffed with messages from guys who wonder aloud about HOW to “lead an exciting life”, be a “man of adventure” or simply, well…how to be more interesting in SOME non-complicated way.

In all fairness, many of us may already be more potentially intriguing and exciting to women than we think. Consider, for example, how easy it is for us as guys to compare ourselves to the highest-functioning men out there and make blanket judgment on the fly that we’re about as boring and “vanilla” as it gets.

I mean, every time you read about Sir Richard Branson he’s doing something new and devastatingly amazing. Wasn’t building an international record company, several airlines, flying hot air balloons, getting a private island and founding Virgin Galactic ENOUGH, already?

You get on Netflix and are confronted with Ewan McGregor riding through Africa on a BMW motorcycle. Most of us would be doing cartwheels to be cast as an extra in the next Star Wars film, but this guy was freaking Obi Wan Kenobi. The next thing you know, he’s going on round-the-world travel adventures.

But here’s the thing. Even THOSE guys spend plenty of “down time” doing mundane stuff. It’s just that the camera isn’t rolling during those times for obvious reasons.

Perhaps we fall into the trap of believing that we have to live like Steve Irwin or James Bond (who’s fictional, no less) or else we’re slackers.

Personally, I believe this mindset comes from the same place as the assumption that all beautiful women are wined and dined 24/7 and whisked off to exotic locations on private jets at least twice a week.

The first step is to relax. You can find paparazzi pics on the Internet of Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher going grocery shopping. If they don’t have to be Lara Croft and/or Indiana Jones, neither do you.

But make no mistake. You can’t be a chronic bump on a log, either. You have to exercise your ability to be interesting at least SOMETIMES, or the “adventure muscle” might atrophy.

So then, what yardstick does one use to figure out whether one is interesting ENOUGH to be at least potentially attractive to MOTOS (members of the other sex)?

 
X-Ray Vision Into A Woman's Deepest Fantasies

 

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12 Things Some Guys Do, Mistakenly Thinking They’re Cool

 
Women Made EasyLet’s have some fun today.

Recently I got into a discussion with a few friends—some female, no less—on the subject of what guys who decidedly don’t “get it” are like.

Essentially, it quickly became a referendum on coolness, particularly in the eyes of women.

As you might imagine it turned out to be a truly fascinating conversation. As such, I felt compelled to share the finer points of it with you.

Recalling what was said, I’ve made a list of a dozen major missteps guys make in the name of being cool which typically result in women thinking the exact OPPOSITE about them.

But before I get on a roll ranting about them all, there are at least three points that deserve to be made.

 
Women Made Easy: What They Do, Why They Do It And How To Be A Man About It

 

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7 Bad-To-The-Bone Skills That Women Love

 
Get Your Game OnI’m not sure what it is lately, but I’ve been getting more than my fair share of e-mails from guys saying something to the effect of this:

“But Scot, I’m incredibly useless/boring/average and there’s nothing about me that a woman would be attracted to, especially compared to other guys out there.”

My knee-jerk reaction is to encourage men who think that way to stop comparing themselves to others and take control over their circumstances instead. Thankfully, we can DO SOMETHING to change the way things are if we just don’t feel like we’ve got a whole lot to offer a woman. That’s what deserving what you want is all about.

But I have to be honest with you. My knee-jerk reaction has to yield to a gut-level hunch in this case. That’s this: I’d be willing to bet that you ALREADY HAVE some pretty badass skills in your toolbox. The problem is that you simply aren’t leveraging them.

Here are seven examples of common skills that thrill women to no end. You may already possess some of these, but the reason I’ve selected them in particular is because they can be acquired with a modicum of effort:

Women Made Easy: What They Do, Why They Do It And How To Be A Man About It

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Do You “Take Yourself Too Seriously”?

 
The Ministry Of Silly WalksI’m going to level with you on this one. Part of why I’m writing this particular blog post is because I want to force myself to finally come to grips with a subject that I’ve always thought I understood—at least in principle—but lately am not so sure I REALLY, TRULY get.

That would be the whole, widely celebrated idea of “taking oneself less seriously”.

Perhaps ironically, this means I’m about to take the topic seriously, for once. Just in case your head is about to explode already, let’s rephrase that: I’m really in the mood to get down to the bottom of it all, especially as it pertains to interpersonal relationships.

No doubt, every single time “taking oneself LESS seriously” is talked about it’s positioned as a GOOD thing. Following logically, “taking oneself TOO seriously” is universally positioned as a BAD thing.

But rather than be sheep and follow the herd, doesn’t it behoove us (sheep have hooves, get it?) to first explore what’s so bad about being “serious” about oneself?

Women Made Easy: What They Do, Why They Do It And How To Be A Man About It

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That New Bud Light Commercial Where They’re On A First Date

 
If you’ve been watching the NCAA tournament at all this year, you’ve probably already seen this commercial about three dozen times:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMExuin6U-c

Considering that it centers around a first date between two people who’ve met online, I figured it would be fun to talk about it some…especially since I haven’t broken down any TV commercials around here lately.

So let’s get into it.

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Pushing Each Other’s “Hot Buttons”

 
The Big Red MonsterWe’re all familiar with the whole concept behind “hot buttons”. Usually, when the topic comes up in conversation it’s in the context of complete exasperation. Some people really just know how to set us off…and the craziest part is that it’s typically the people we know best.

If you grew up with siblings, that was likely your initiation into this whole reality…whether your buttons were being pressed or you were doing the pressing.

Personally, I was the oldest of three by five and seven years respectively. Geez, did my kid brother and sister ever know exactly how to make me mad.

And given the fact that they generally got away with their shenanigans while I got blamed for whatever mayhem ensued made things all that much worse for me and hilarious for them.

Yep…they knew exactly what buttons to push in order to get the desired (i.e. highly entertaining) results.

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Top 10 Songs That Are Guaranteed To Make Her Hot For You

 
This Is Only How It Starts...I was recently asked during a media interview what my favorite “love song” was.

My first “knee jerk” reaction was, well…NO reaction.

I mean, I’m a guy. Who asks a dude a question like that and expects an answer any different than, say, “Let’s Get Drunk And Screw” by Jimmy Buffett? I mean, it’s just begging for a sarcastic retort, at best.

But your boy–being the mature type such that I am–took the high road. I asked for a few seconds to think about my answer, and I gave one. It was a REAL good one, actually (see #1 below).

And the more I thought about it, the more I came to the realization that all of as guys really should give more thought to that question. It really is an excellent idea to have some really amazing “love songs” in mind…you know, should the need for one ever arise.

Here’s the thing though. I suspect that a lot of y’all are like me. You hear the term “love song” and immediately think of something sappy and wussified like “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt or “She’s So High” by Tal Bachman.

Heck, even most of the old Motown classics like “Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch” and “Ain’t Too Proud To Beg” are lame because they’re needy as all get out (whatever that means).

But hold your horses, my brethren.

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10 Simple Tests Of Whether You’re A Wimp Or Not

 
By now you know all too well that being a “wuss” is not attractive to women at all.

The very essence of what ignites femininity is directly tied to facing fear with courage, coming up with a plan when crisis hits and being a protector when danger and uncertainty loom.

And, well…you just can’t be ANY of those things if you’re a “scaredy-cat”, now can you?

Most of us will never be faced with storming Bin Laden’s camp in Pakistan, landing an airliner in the Hudson River or fending off a pack of wild tigers in the Sri Lankan jungle.

That’s all well and good, but you WILL need to be able to get through normal, everyday life in post-modern culture.

For better or worse, life in that context really does present nearly constant challenges to “man up”…even if they’re small or even subtle ones.

Nevertheless, you can bet your bottom dollar that women are watching.

With that in mind, I hereby present to you ten very basic, simple tests to tell with almost 100% certainty what kind of man you are.

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It’s A Girl!

Sarah Victoria Annabelle McKay arrived on Monday, 12/19 at 9:50 pm CST. Both Emily and the baby are doing fine.

Here’s a pic of her when she’s literally less than 5 minutes old.

Turn OFF The Bright Lights...Geez!

Here’s another when she was a few hours old.

Zzzzz...

…And another taken just this afternoon.

Zzzzz... (redux)

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The Magic Word That Leads To A Better Social Life

X & Y Communications Coach Austin ParkerI’ve been a bit of a workaholic lately. I bring this up because I’m tired after my work weeks and don’t always feel the energy.

A friend of mine recently called and said “Hey, Austin, how would you like to go do this zombie walk?” What’s a “zombie walk”? As it turns out, it’s a several hour affair where you rip up the shirt, stain it with fake blood, white stage makeup, and wander around aimlessly looking for babes and braiiiins. At 5pm on that certain Friday my friend called, however, I wasn’t really in the mood to commit to such a thing. But I said “yes”…because I knew I had to.

And here is why.

“Yes” is the secret word that will bestow social riches upon you. Your friends, girlfriends, and acquaintances are likely throwing interesting opportunities at you all the time. Sometimes these opportunities sound like more work than fun. I mean tearing up a shirt, wearing make up…who wants to do all that, especially on short notice? But I went for it, and once I got going I had some momentum and had a really kick ass time.

So next time you’re asked something by your friends, say “yes”. Always say “yes”. It’s the secret word that will lead to more opportunities.

–Austin

 
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True Story: How To Handle AMOG Attempts By Pro Athletes

First of all, I just wanted to let everyone know that it’s me, Scot, who is posting this. Jim didn’t originally intend for what you are about to read to be a blog post. He was simply dropping me a note to tell me what had happened the night before. Posting it is purely my doing.

As a coach for X & Y Communications, Jim has come a LONG way with women in a relatively short amount of time. These days he’s got the greatest woman he’s ever met in his life…and she apparently is just as happy as he is. What you’re about to read underscores that.

Enjoy this story from Jim. In my mind, it clearly demonstrates the all-conquering power of being a “big four” man, as outlined in The Master Plan.

 

Hey Scot,

Funny story for you from last night. So Heidi and I went to a country night down the street from where I live at a local watering hole I frequent. Heidi was looking GORGEOUS and dropping jaws and derailing freight trains last night.

So she and I noticed a table of guys who were being extremely obvious staring at girls and then saying the usual stuff. So Heidi went to go to the bathroom and I could not help but smile when the three of them were staring at her with their tongues hanging out.

 

 

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What Women REALLY Want: If You Think It’s MONEY, Read This…

James Bond Would Cringe...As Am IOK, here is a letter from a woman that I felt particularly compelled to share. If you’ve just finished reading my latest newsletter, then this is the SECOND e-mail from a woman you’ve seen written in response to what we’re talking about in The Master Plan.

The message is clear, gentlemen. Women want their men back. And unlike “underground” seduction tactics, we talk about what really works with women in broad daylight (no pun intended).

Does it make perfect sense that women just might rave about dating advice that really works? Does it also make perfect sense that if you’ve got to hide your strategies from women they might not work? Man, I really hope so by now.

But just in case you’re still on the fence, read this:

LETTER FROM A WOMAN

Hi Scot,

I find your newsletters interesting, and from a female perspective, I totally agree with the “Big Four” characteristics you mention (masculinity, confidence,inspiring confidence in women, and character).

I’ve met some men who on paper looked like great catches, but I ultimately decided not to pursue a relationship with them because something just didn’t feel right. Looking at those four characteristics you mention, in each case, the man didn’t have one or more of the four characteristics.

 

 

 

Continue reading “What Women REALLY Want: If You Think It’s MONEY, Read This…”

The Master Plan Is LIVE

Become The High Quality Man Women Crave With The Master PlanToday is the day everything changes.

Until now, it has been implied to us as guys that we needed to “soften our demeanor”, “be nice” and otherwise fall in line with modern “feminized” culture.

The problem? Although we’ve been encouraged to think masculinity is somehow a bad thing, nobody ever gave us a roadmap for what to replace it with.

Obviously, the answer isn’t to be more feminine. Nothing lands a guy in the “Just Be Friends” zone more quickly.

So are we supposed to just “turn off” the masculinity…cold turkey? Well…if you’re neuter, you pretty much have zero chance at attracting anyone sexually.

Maybe the solution is a lot more simple.: There really isn’t anything wrong with masculinity to begin with.

That’s what I personally believe. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that most women want their men back.

 

 

 

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The Master Plan — You Already Are A “Natural”

Become The High Quality Man Women Crave With The Master PlanLately there’s been lots of talk about “natural game”…as if all we need to do is emulate a guy who we see as a “natural”, and we’ll somehow become more attractive to women.

Now sure, having some guys who are great with women show you the ropes isn’t such a bad idea. But do we really need to copy someone else’s entire persona in order to successfully attract the kind of women we want?

Well, a lot of us as guys have been suspecting something all along: We are all “naturals”. By being born male, we’re supposed to be attractive to women by our very nature. Simply put, you were BORN to attract women.

 

 

 

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