Dating Coaching – Page 2 – The Official Blog Of Scot McKay

The Chick Whisperer Podcast #38: Quit Making Things So Complicated

When I called up the Adonis Effect’s Brad Howard and extended the long-overdue invitation to co-host the podcast with me, I also asked him to suggest a topic. This is pretty typical, since the shows are always best when we riff on whatever the co-host’s specialty is.

Well, Brad wasted no time when faced with this question.

“Oh, that’s an easy one. Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about how difficult we as guys try to make meeting and relating to women out to be. But really, it just doesn’t have to be all that hard, you know?”

I instinctively knew that was a winner of an idea.

After all, not only did I agree 100% with his opinion on the matter, we had never actually talked about it on the show.

So 52 minutes of recording later, that all had changed. Now you can listen to Episode 38 of the world famous Chick Whisperer podcast and decide for yourself whether we’re on to something here, or whether we’re completely off base.

But one thing’s for sure, if you don’t do any listening, then you certainly can’t do any deciding. Right?

Now, whether or not you agree that meeting and relating to women is complicated or not, getting your hands on this episode most definitely isn’t as difficult as you might think. All you need to do is hit iTunes and click the “subscribe” button.

The Chick Whisperer podcast even has “iPod friendly” titles and album art, so finding it amidst the thousands of other files is just about as uncomplicated as listening to it.

Subscribe On iTunes Now

The iTunes page for The Chick Whisperer podcast is linked to from every graphic in this post. If you’d be so kind as to leave us a review, we’d be much obliged. Your input really does influence iTunes rankings.

And if you’re the type of guy who just isn’t so into iTunes, then no worries. There’s always that old standby, the RSS feed. You can click on the link below to subscribe over there:

Subscribe Via RSS Feed

Be Good,

Scot

P.S. Brad and I also cover a great voice mail question from Craig in Colorado on how to build a social circle and meet women FAST. Good stuff.

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The Man's Approach ... Coming This Summer From X & Y Communications

The Chick Whisperer Podcast # 37: MILFs And Cougars

OK, so here it is. I’ve been meaning to have my good friend Brad Jackson on the show as a co-host for quite some time now.

So the other day I finally got on the phone and told him it was time to stop all the talk and get to a little more action, Jackson. A whopping sixty minutes later, episode #37 had emerged from the ashes of what truly was an epic podcasting session.

I’m going to tell it to you like it is. (Actually, both of us are, if you get right down to it.) What you are about to grace your iPod with is nothing short of the most straight-up, no-holds-barred discussion on both single-moms and cougars that’s ever invaded your eardrums.

Whether that sounds exceedingly pleasant or utterly horrifying to you, you’re probably right. But one thing’s for sure: The experience will be both an enlightening and and entertaining one for you.

And to make matters even more complicated, we went ahead and answered a particularly “touchy-feelie” voice mail from Lawrence in Santa Monica, who wants to know how to get a woman sexually interested in you without necessarily mating with her for life. Not a bad question there, Lawrence.

Well, with that all that’s really left to talk about is how to go to the RSS feed and subscribe. That’s pretty brain-dead simple. Just click on the link below and make it happen:

Subscribe Via RSS Feed

…or saunter on over to iTunes and get that show onto your iPod. As always, I’ve made the title “iPod friendly” so you’ll actually be able to find the thing once you download it:

Subscribe On iTunes Now

The iTunes page for The Chick Whisperer podcast can be accessed by clicking on any of the graphics in this post, as always. While you’re there, please leave us a review. These really do influence iTunes rankings, so your opinion definitely matters.

Be Good,

Scot

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The Man's Approach ... Coming This Summer From X & Y Communications

Field Report: “I Presently Have Six Quality Women In My Life”

The Author And His Friend, The Former Bud Girl This email is in reference to your News Letter about guys learning information to meet quality women and not applying what is taught to the real world. I am 100% living proof that your advice works. I have developed leaps and bounds after following your wisdom and reading your news letters. Your one on one counseling is superb. With that said, I presently have 6 quality women in my life. I know it’s not about the numbers, but the quality that counts. However, when guys start becoming successful, it happens, and a new learning process starts for yet another level. It has taken me three years to get here. Truth be told, if I can do it, anyone can.

One very important lesson that I have learned in the attraction process is for a guy to gain knowledge from other successful men and then, more importantly, apply this information to his life. Scot, what you and other experts have taught me is that it first starts with me learning from others and then acting on the gained knowledge to become a better man. There is no quick launch method, no attraction pill, and there is no one thing I can say or do to attract women. Who you are and how you attract women is all about learning and applying; making it part of who you are. I have learned that 20% of your time should be spent gaining book knowledge and 80% of your time should be spent applying what is learned to real life, with real females. The Army has a saying: a mediocre plan timely executed is far better than the most detailed plan not executed at all. Here is some general information that I have learned. If I had advice for those starting out, it is this:

1) If your desire is to attract better women, then become a better man that attracts women. The information is out there for those who want to learn. Make what you learn who you are in the real world. Learn by applying.

2) Learn to stop analyzing your actions with women, let go, and have fun. Be creative and become a kid again. Learn to be fun with women. Make meeting women a fun game. Adopt an attitude that you will put a smile on every woman’s face that you interact with in some way. I am living proof that it is fun to learn methods, apply, and spend time with quality women.

3) Get out and test everything. You must fail before you can succeed with women. Failure is your best friend. It’s tough love. Believe me, I learned to be cocky and funny the hard way. I turned more women off because I did not know how and when to apply. But experience prevailed! Even more important is learning to become masculine, naturally confident, and how to make it fun in almost any given situation. Learn creative conversations, spontaneity, intrigue, and how to shock her in a fun way. Learn to become the “man” of a woman’s dream and what that means.

4) Know your strength and weakness with women. Write out a plan to overcome your weaknesses and break your weaknesses down into small steps. Learning to be successful with women is a process. Develop small processes that work, add them to your entire attraction process system, and build upon it. You must learn attraction basics, develop a process that works for you, and lead women through it.

5) It is important to know that there are lots of quality women in the world and fewer quality guys who get it. Take advantage of these odds by becoming an attractive man that women want to be around. Know what you want and become a man that attracts her.

I have learned so much and I believe it’s time to tell my story. I still have far to go to where I want to be. As you know, it all works on levels and I am not there yet. However, I am also nowhere near the bottom and I have taken all that I have learned to heart. Right now life is fun and my biggest challenge is learning to manage my “hanging out” (dating) life. I have learned to not date anymore, but to simply hang-out when I find someone that I want to spend my time with. I have learned its not money or how much time, however, it is the “experience” that counts. I have learned to develop the experience by becoming spontaneous, intriguing, interesting, fun, and safe. I focus on making myself more excellent. I have learned it’s about having fun and relaxing. I approach women as it being exciting to find out who they are and challenging to take a woman through the attraction process. I have learned that the process is an adventure that is everywhere and anywhere I make it out to be.

— Kevin Kelly (Colorado Springs, CO)

Lt. Col. Kevin Kelly is currently on active duty in the U.S. Army in Colorado, having recently returned from yearlong tour in Afghanistan. He’s finishing up a Ten-Plus program with me and obviously doing great. I was pleasantly surprised to receive this detailed account from him in last night’s e-mail, and it’s reprinted with his permission. Thanks for your service to our country, and for sharing your insights, Kevin. Terrific stuff.

As far as your success with women goes, if you’re interested in going from where you are right now to where you want to be then Ten-Plus is probably right for you also. It’s a guided plan of action with guaranteed results. For more, check out dating-coaches.com. or contact me personally at scot@deservewhatyouwant.com.

Online Dating Vs. Dating Online

Get Off The Phone And Meet The Woman In Person During the conversation Zan Perrion and I had for The Master Plan one of the most fascinating themes we discussed was how we as a modern culture are becoming more and more disconnected from each other.

One’s first thought when considering that idea is, “Hey, wait a minute. Everyone’s got an Internet connection and a cell phone these days. If anything, we’re more connected.”

But that’s precisely the issue. With the ability to get online for “typing and Skyping” on the fly, and the advent of text messaging we can communicate easier than ever. Granted.

But do we really connect?

Zan and I were in 100% agreement that we do not. Despite all the technology allowing us to communicate, people are actually gathering less often in real life. In the framework of our “wired” lifestyle we actually tend to meet fewer people in real life than we used to, and less often.

And perhaps most alarmingly, it would appear we like it that way.

One key example we covered was how people are actually dating online instead of online dating.

What am I talking about here?

Continue reading “Online Dating Vs. Dating Online”

What Women REALLY Want: If You Think It’s MONEY, Read This…

OK, here is a letter from a woman that I felt particularly compelled to share. If you’ve just finished reading my latest newsletter, then this is the SECOND e-mail from a woman you’ve seen written in response to what we’re talking about in The Master Plan.

The message is clear, gentlemen. Women want their men back. And unlike “underground” seduction tactics, we talk about what really works with women in broad daylight (no pun intended).

Does it make perfect sense that women just might rave about dating advice that really works? Does it also make perfect sense that if you’ve got to hide your strategies from women they might not work? Man, I really hope so by now.

But just in case you’re still on the fence, read this:

LETTER FROM A WOMAN

Hi Scot,

I find your newsletters interesting, and from a female perspective, I totally agree with the “Big Four” characteristics you mention (masculinity, confidence,inspiring confidence in women, and character).

I’ve met some men who on paper looked like great catches, but I ultimately decided not to pursue a relationship with them because something just didn’t feel right. Looking at those four characteristics you mention, in each case, the man didn’t have one or more of the four characteristics.

Continue reading “What Women REALLY Want: If You Think It’s MONEY, Read This…”

The Master Plan Is LIVE

Today is the day everything changes.

Until now, it has been implied to us as guys that we needed to “soften our demeanor”, “be nice” and otherwise fall in line with modern “feminized” culture.

The problem? Although we’ve been encouraged to think masculinity is somehow a bad thing, nobody ever gave us a roadmap for what to replace it with.

Obviously, the answer isn’t to be more feminine. Nothing lands a guy in the “Just Be Friends” zone more quickly.

So are we supposed to just “turn off” the masculinity…cold turkey? Well…if you’re neuter, you pretty much have zero chance at attracting anyone sexually.

Maybe the solution is a lot more simple.: There really isn’t anything wrong with masculinity to begin with.

That’s what I personally believe. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that most women want their men back.

Continue reading “The Master Plan Is LIVE”

The Master Plan — You Already Are A “Natural”

Lately there’s been lots of talk about “natural game”…as if all we need to do is emulate a guy who we see as a “natural”, and we’ll somehow become more attractive to women.

Now sure, having some guys who are great with women show you the ropes isn’t such a bad idea. But do we really need to copy someone else’s entire persona in order to successfully attract the kind of women we want?

Well, a lot of us as guys have been suspecting something all along: We are all “naturals”. By being born male, we’re supposed to be attractive to women by our very nature. Simply put, you were BORN to attract women.

Continue reading “The Master Plan — You Already Are A “Natural””

To Those Starting The Journey

“And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

–Anais Nin

Congratulations on making a decision that will transform your life.

Seriously, congratulations. You may think “I haven’t done anything, I just got tired of spending Saturday nights playing Minesweeper/staring at the lobotomy box/nervously gawking at hotties from across the bar.”

But you’ve decided to master your own life and stop wallowing in a septic tank of self-pity. How many people have come to the same realization as you and decided to do nothing, or worse–whine and yowl about it?

And let’s not forget the second part of that sentence—”…making a decision that will transform your life.” It’s not just about your ability to date. That extra confidence will show on the basketball court, in the client’s office, and at Thanksgiving dinner with your own family members.

Now, the first step of the journey is to take a long, hard look into the darkest corners of your brain.

Continue reading “To Those Starting The Journey”

A Pickup Line Is No Longer A Pickup Line If SHE Started It

Cheesy Pickup Line Lately I’ve been coaching more guys on how to succeed at online dating than ever before, and time and again I encounter something that amazes me.

I think we could all agree that using cheesy pickup lines are decidedly not the best strategy when it comes to approaching women. In fact, they’ve kind of become a running joke.

But when our attention turns to the online dating world, something fascinating happens.

Most of what guys are being taught in terms of sending first emails to women seems oddly familiar.

Yeppers…you got it. “Cut and paste templates designed to promote banter and therefore create rapport” is really long for “pickup lines”.

Continue reading “A Pickup Line Is No Longer A Pickup Line If SHE Started It”

Online Dating: Loaded Down With Questions [Video]

OK, here’s yet another video blog for you, loaded down with online dating tips just for you.

And appropriately as such, this particular video considers what to do when someone you’ve just met starts loading you down with questions….

So tell me, I bet you can relate to this one, can’t you? Let’s hear your stories!

Be Good,

Scot

P.S. Tomorrow we’ll hear from new X & Y Communications coach Joseph Jensen for the first time. His style is a unique one, so get ready for something completely different for sure.

The Team Has Been Expanded: Six New Instructors Named

I couldn’t be more pleased to bring you today’s major announcement.

The X & Y Communications team has been expanded to include six new instructors.

We have known for several months now that the character-based approach to dating and seduction advice was powerful enough and had gained enough traction that we wanted to bring more voices and unique perspectives into the mix.

Long hours of thought have been given to the process of identifying and equipping the right ones for that job, and now that the day has come I am proud to introduce you to our newest contributing consultants.

I’ve set each of the six new official instructors up with a bio at a new page created specifically for that purpose:

http://www.edumckaytion.com/blog/team

Starting Wednesday morning, plan on direct contributions to this blog from each new team member on a semi-regular basis, which will offer a great chance to get to know what each respective one adds to the mix.

Emily and I also intend to expand the team further in the near future to include at least two women as fellow instructors.

Thank you to each and every one of you who have supported the X & Y Communications purpose and continue to do so. It is that support that makes growth possible, all in the name of better serving your needs as you deserve what you want.

You have our pledge to continue raising the bar for you at every opportunity.

Please extend a warm welcome to our new team members with your comments.

Be Good,

Scot McKay

Hire Me As Your Dating Coach, Get Into A Top MBA Program

As you already know, our dating coaching style is VERY different.

We talk about excellence a lot. Not just with women, but in life. That’s exactly what character-based attraction and seduction is all about. [Note: To certain black-hat “bootcampers” who are bogarting my term lately, I challenge you to a debate on how exactly “character-based” anything can be taught by a FICTIONAL character. But I digress.] You become a great man (as opposed to a “Mr. Nice Guy” or a “Bad Boy”) and you attract great women. It isn’t all that complicated.

So it’s perhaps not entirely unexpected to receive an e-mail like the one I just opened about a half-hour ago from Frank in Boston: Continue reading “Hire Me As Your Dating Coach, Get Into A Top MBA Program”