Scot McKay – Page 7 – The Official Blog Of Scot McKay

Who Says The Leading Man ISN’T About Pickup, After All?

Okay, so you’ve been hearing me tell you about how The Leading Man is all about relationship management. And although I do share some secrets for establishing yourself as a relationship manager from minute one when you meet a woman, mostly I’ve been saying that The Leading Man focuses on what happens after pickup.

That’s all well and good, because there are plenty of pickup products out there already–and virtually nothing on how to have a solid long-term relationship with the right woman for you. Sure, a few scattered programs may give lightweight lip service to the importance of being able to keep women around long-term and such, but they always end up talking about how fast you can get any woman into bed…again. Right?

So I’ve been doing what I can to make it abundantly clear that The Leading Man is not about pickup.

Well, just when I think I have it all figured out…Victor from Hawaii stops me dead in my tracks with this e-mail:

Continue reading “Who Says The Leading Man ISN’T About Pickup, After All?”

Structured Authentic Game

A few years ago when I was just starting on this journey to becoming a man who is successful with women, I studied a lot of material on the structure of “outer” game. As many people here would know, a lot of various seduction-related sources agree on the general structure of the game. This can be loosely divided into the following sections: opening, building attraction, qualification, developing rapport or comfort & trust, and seduction.

At the time, I learnt a lot of canned lines and stories to be told during each of these stages to successfully progress to the next “level” in the seduction process. And I must tell you, I had a few issues with this approach.

Mainly, I felt that a lot of the material was totally incongruent to my personality, and instead of showing my real myself, I was presenting a girl with some kind of artificial “Pick Up Persona”. This persona was also extremely hard to maintain when I met the girl the next time, or to develop a relationship with the girl. And as honesty and authenticity are my core values, no wonder that I didn’t enjoy much that kind of game.

Continue reading “Structured Authentic Game”

Name Memorization And The Art Of Working the Room

Before you read this post, I ask that you ready yourself to learn and apply what you’re about to read.

When I first got into pickup this was my “working the room” game and it brought me much success. I challenge you to try this at your next customer meeting, house party, or night out.

Without further ado:

In the past I was terrible with names. When I was in college I was an orientation team leader one year. I had 20 freshman and I struggled with their names. To me this was embarrassing. Ask yourself, how can you hope to project any kind of interest in someone if you can’t even get their name right?

For this post I will discuss three types of learning senses: Audio, visual, and kinesthetic. We’ve all heard “use someones name as soon as you meet them”, or “visualize the person naked with their name tattooed across their forehead”, and you can think of others. I learned another technique that helped me as a kinesthetic (learn by doing!) guy. After you learn someone’s name and successfully repeat it, use your writing hand and discreetly go through the motion of writing their name with your hand.

Continue reading “Name Memorization And The Art Of Working the Room”

The Leading Man Is Now Available Worldwide

As of yesterday at noon Texas time, The Leading Man has now been released to the world.

Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock, you already know that this is the world’s first complete system for relationship management. If you’re on anyone else’s mailing list besides mine and/or read any one else’s blog you’ve probably heard about it at least once elsewhere.

What you may not know, however, is that I made major “surprise” additions to The Leading Man just in time for its official worldwide launch.

Granted, there was already over ten hours of detailed instruction on how to wear the pants without losing your shirt, how to quarterback your relationships instead of feeling like the waterboy, and how to lock down the “revolving door” of women in your life.

But now I’ve also included a special bonus video featuring X & Y Communications coach Jim Dalton and I talking about how to select an amazing woman while eliminating the wrong ones. This is your first chance to see one of our new coaches in action.

Plus, I’ve added a killer new “round table” discussion. In it, you’re going to get women’s opinions on what exactly
what they want from a man in terms of effective relationship management I invited none other than Kim from Pickup Podcast, Liz from Inner Game Magazine and–of course–Emily from right here at X & Y Communications. In other words, YES…you’re going to find out whether or not what I teach in The Leading Man is on the money or not…even in our own household.

Then, just to make sure I packed as much value as I knew how to into this thing, I added four more bonuses…each of which could easily stand alone as a separate product (in fact, a couple of them have before).

I have to tell you, response has been tremendous thus far, about 26 hours into the launch. There is clearly a demand for this sort of teaching, so it is my honor and privilege to share with you absolutely everything I’ve got on how to build solid relationships with high-quality women.

So, go ahead and check out the four free videos I have on the site for you, and also be sure to join the special mailing list I have set up for The Leading Man while you’re there. I’m giving away a mountain of free bonus gifts…just for signing up.

And YES…the price for this system is going to be going up to $147 from it’s $97 release price sometime this coming week. Just in case you’re still on the fence about whether or not to pull the trigger on this special launch week offer, consider this e-mail from Georgiy in “parts unknown”:

hey man,

you’re charging TOO LITTLE for your program with all the hype you’ve created.

I observed your whole launch process, and with all the buzz you have created the price you charge should be at least twice as much. I was hoping to see 297!!!

I’m telling you this because I’ve been a student of jeff walker and frank kern for a long time and that is just my humble opinion 😉

-Georgiy

Hmm…I guess Jeff Walker and Frank Kern’s loss is your gain. By the way, I told Georgiy that he was more than welcome to buy three copies of The Leading Man if it made him feel better.

Nah, I just want to make The Leading Man more accessible to everyone who wants stronger, more satisfying long-term relationships with great women. In fact, you can even break the $97 special launch week price into three monthly pieces if you’d like to.

So take a look, and let me know what you think if you get in on it. I’ve put my heart and soul into The Leading Man, and I think you’ll enjoy it.

Be Good,

Scot

P.S. By the way, I am absolutely, positively going to be expanding this program as I have Virtuosity. The first addition is already planned…

Your Phone Game Tip For The Day

Once upon a time, there was a guy. Let’s call him Dan. He worked for a major courier company, delivering parcels on the same route just about every day.

There was one particular business on his route where a particularly attractive receptionist worked. Let’s call her Maryanne. She had been on the job for a few weeks, and our hero had gradually turned up the banter each time he had seen her there.

It was only occasionally that this particular business received parcels, so he knew he had to make the most of every opportunity when he saw her.

Finally, one glorious day, Dan gathered up his nerve and asked Maryanne for her phone number.

She immediately and noticeably brightened up, and eagerly scribbled her number on the back of a business card. She handed it to Dan with a smile, and said…”Yes! Call me!”

After the customary three days had passed, courier-dude texted her one bright morning. “Hey there, Maryanne. It’s Dan. What’s up?”

Dan waited. But there was no answer. When evening had come, and he couldn’t take it anymore, he fired off another text. “Hey Maryanne. I’m sure you’re busy, but get back to me when you get a chance.”

But there was still no answer. Only crickets chirping and pins dropping.

As fortune would have it, Dan had a package the next day that required delivery where Maryanne worked.

Nervously, he walked in the door. As soon as he made eye contact with Maryanne, she looked away immediately. Obviously sensing the awkwardness of the situation, neither said a word to each other as Dan dropped off the package.

About an hour after leaving, Dan couldn’t get Maryanne off his mind. This time, he texted her the following message: “OK, Maryanne, what’s wrong? Did I upset you somehow?”

You guessed it…no answer.

Having pretty much lost all hope of dating Maryanne, Dan’s emotional state turned to anger and resentment toward her. “How come there aren’t any pretty women out there who don’t play games? And how come they are all so flighty and immature?”

Two days later, Dan had another package to be delivered where Maryanne worked. When he walked in, Maryanne once again avoided eye contact with renewed awkwardness.

But Dan’s frustration got the best of him. “OK, look”, Dan said, “I texted you a whole bunch of times, and I can’t believe you’ve completely ignored me! Where do you get off flirting with guys and looking all happy when they ask you for your phone number, when all you’re going to do is mess with their heads!?”

The answer Dan received was as terse as they come.

Maryanne had given Dan her home phone number…which was a land line, of course.

Be Good,

Scot

Why I Wake Up Excited In The Morning

Having read the title of this post, I have a guess what you might be thinking. No, it’s not necessarily because Emily is in a frisky mood…again.

At least that’s not what I’m referring to this time.

Instead, I have a letter from a reader that I want to share with you. His name is Marcio, from Brasil.

Now I remember when Marcio first got Virtuosity and subscribed to Power Sessions. That was several months ago, and he told me he felt he had a long way to go with women.

Today, things are different for him. I’ll let his field report speak for itself:

Continue reading “Why I Wake Up Excited In The Morning”

Thundercat’s BootyCast

How’s it going everyone?

Today I was Joseph “Thundercat” Matthews’ guest on his BootyCast podcast. Surprised? Well, don’t ever say I shy away from hardcore Seduction Community stuff because this is the real deal.

I’ll tell you what, Thundy’s blog readers are about as tough an audience as I’ve seen out there. We talked a bit about online dating on the show, and the comments started coming in that I must be full of it. After all, it has to be “impossible” to find oneself dating 16 women at once and/or pulling a 60-80% response rate on first e-mails. Well, it’s all true. And better yet, those who “suspend disbelief” and take on the Online Dating Domination challenge for themselves tend to get results.

But anyway, there’s lots of fun stuff on the show so I encourage you to grab a listen. Joseph pretty much plants me on the “hot seat” and keeps me there, which I always prefer to the same old mundane questions.

For example, find out why a married guy can be a dating coach. Discover how on Earth I could give up dating tons of women for blissful monogamy. Heck, find out why I think “blissful monogamy” rocks in general. It’s all in there like Prego spaghetti sauce (which we don’t talk about on the show).

And yes, we get around to talking relationship management too, of course.

Here’s the link:

Thundercat Seduction Lair

By the way, I’ve been absolutely slammed making The Leading Man extra killer. Once launch day comes next Saturday the 13th, you can expect only the best. In other words, I’ll get back to posting more heavy-duty blog content real soon. In the mean time, be sure get on the pre-launch mailing list . I’m already giving away mountains of cool stuff on relationship management.

Be Good,

Scot McKay

P.S. Have you seen this crazy stuff that Matthews is talking about lately? Check out Pure Personality for yourself.

The Chick Whisperer #24–Taking Care Of Business In The Bedroom

That’s right, this episode is all about sexual wizardry. Make your woman want to purrrrr like the kitten she is. Meow.

All of this is courtesy of my man Alex Allman, author of Revolutionary Sex. He’s the co-host this go-round, and flat-out delivers the goods.

What more would you expect? After all, we’ve been harping on relationship management around her lately non-stop…for good reason.

From minute one, you can expect to hear tips and strategies that will clearly take your sexual prowess to the next level. Alex brought his A-game here, no doubt.

If you’d like to control your orgasms a bit better, Alex has exactly the plan for you.

Wondering how to make sure she is satisfied fully and completely? Have we got some shocking answers.

We even break down how to kiss her so correctly her head might explode. After all, you’ve got to start somewhere–and that’s the best place I can think of to do so.

Hot stuff. And you are guaranteed to have not heard some of this ever before anywhere.

Imagine hanging a shingle outside your door that says, “Melting Women Is My Specialty”. Your darn skippy. Make it so, captain.

OK, so all you really need is less blathering and more of a way to get your hands on this.

Subscribe and download on iTunes using any of the graphics on this post. If you do, please be kind enough to write a short review in support of the show if you would. That helps more than you can imagine–and I know you have a pretty vivid imagination, no less.

If you’re not on iTunes, you can subscribe via the feed here.

By the way, sign up for the newsletter and get the special bonus video collection called “Coolness Personified” if you haven’t already. It’s not going to cost you a dime.

Be Good,

Scot

P.S. Did you like that? Two new podcasts in two days. We aim to please. By the way, if all of this wasn’t enough, I’ve actually got TCW #25 in the can already also. I’d been after the co-host of that one for literally months, dragging him kicking and screaming back into the Seduction Community spotlight after a ridiculously long absence. And yes, I’m keeping it a secret for now…

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X & Y On The Fly #39–Dealing With Exes

Who wants “drama” with exes? Certainly not us. And unless you’re weird or something, neither do you.

So that said, tune in to the latest episode of X & Y On The Fly and find out how Emily and I have kept that stuff to a bare minimum in our life, and–more importantly–how you can do the same.

And while we were at it, we tackled the ridiculously-complex topic of how to get an ex back, if that’s what you want. Find out killer strategies for getting an ex boyfriend or girlfriend back after you screw up–regardless of who broke up with whom.

…Of course, that’s all assuming you really want that ex back after all. Do you really?

Whatever the case, whether you have an “ex” to deal with at the moment or not, this show will arm you with some serious knowledge that you’ll likely find immensely valuable someday–one way or another.

All of this, of course, is oddly appropriate considering all this talk about relationship management lately thanks to the upcoming release of The Leading Man.

Plus, this stuff is just flat-out entertaining. Especially when Emily says “meow” instead of “now” like she does.

As always, hit our main page to get in on the newsletter and grab your free copy of How To Deal With Breakups. This show is a great excuse to do exactly that, right?

Be Good,

Scot

P.S. If you like what you hear, please leave us a review on iTunes…and by all means subscribe. If you aren’t so into iTunes, you can subscribe using our feed too.

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Tonight: X Factor Dating’s Singles Showcase

I’m pleased to announce that I am part of the X Factor Dating’s Singles Showcase for September.

As a matter of fact, out of 21 dating experts they are going to be featuring this month, I get the honor of going first.

As such, I am going to be on a teleseminar tonight at 9p EDT/6p PDT where you can ask me questions about relationships and dating. This is your chance! Ask away tonight, and listen in to the rest of the series throughout the month.

There are some amazing authors, relationship coaches and experts available for you. They’ve invited a lot of names from literally all over the world of dating advice, so this should be very interesting. Expect to get all sorts of perspectives. Here’s the link again to check it out:

X Factor Dating’s Singles Showcase

By the way, with The Leading Man coming on 13 September, we’re just getting warmed up. Wait until you see whose show I’ve already recorded for release on Friday…

Be Good,

Scot McKay

Make Your Authentic Voice Heard

As I was driving home a couple of days ago thinking about writing this post, I got a message from my friend that sounded a bit new-agey but perfectly summarised some of my ideas on how we can relate to women from the position of authenticity.

That message said: “In your most authentic self your subconscious will appoint you to positions of spectacular grandeur. Unfortunately your well meaning but overactive mind replaces these appointments of success with positions of failure and inadequacy. It is only this reflex dis-appointment that prevents you from achieving your most fantastic, wondrous and incredible goals, because to your true self they are not goals but inevitable realities.”

As you know, there is a lot of advice out there in the Seduction Community telling men canned lines and stories to be told to women to win their hearts. This advice assumes that what you have to say as a man is not good enough to be told and has to be substituted with someone else’s lines.

But is this really true? Don’t you have your unique, authentic voice deep inside that always knows what to say and how to say it?

Continue reading “Make Your Authentic Voice Heard”

Three Tips For Guys Who Are Starting Out

In today’s post I’m going to try to break down some of the things that I did when I was starting out on this journey that I believe helped me out.

First, I recommend getting some friends/wingmen who are also along this journey.

I met 4 guys early on after I joined a forum. These guys were also from Sydney, and didn’t have that creepy vibe that many guys in the community give out. The advantage of having friends who are on the same, or similar, path as you is that you have someone to just vent with, someone who can push you, and someone you can just chill with.

It is possible to take this journey on your own, but its a hell of a lot more fun when you have like minded guys coming with you. A good place to meet like minded individuals is on www.deservewhatyouwant.com/forum or on the forums at www.pickuppodcast.com where they have a whole section dedicated to finding wingmen.

My second tip was actually given to me by one of my wingmen. Write a blog. There are many places where you can go to write a blog, www.blogspot.com is one example.

Continue reading “Three Tips For Guys Who Are Starting Out”

The Leading Man: Web Site Is LIVE

After pulling several “all nighters” this week, the all-new web site for The Leading Man has been launched.

About a week ago, I let you in on some of the very basic details in this blog post.

Now, you can find out what all is included–in detail–and even get four killer video tips on relationship management when you log in that you can start using right now.

Here’s the site:

The Leading Man

Take a look, and enjoy the videos. By the way, I’m going to have some cool surprise bonuses for those who get on my information list.

After all, life is way too short to have a “revolving door” of women in and out of your life. Pickup skills carry you through the first ten minutes. Relationship management is forever.

Whether you want to date multiple women, identify and attract the greatest woman you’ve ever met, become the leader who “wears the pants” in your relationships or all of the above…The Leading Man is the complete system designed to get you to exactly where you want to be.

So take a look at the site, and be sure to share your feedback.

Be Good,

Scot McKay

Be a Social Leader in One Easy Step

In my journey through pickup I’ve found this whole thing is more about learning social leadership than anything else.

One thing we all have in common is we are leaders.

If we weren’t leaders we would settle for what we get like everyone else does. Today I’d like to help you assume your role as social leader among your friends in one easy step. Are you nervous?

Don’t be. This is really easy.

Being a social leader isn’t dominating the conversation, talking too much, or acting like a jerk to your friends.

Rather being a social leader is that fun guy (or gal) who brings something to the lives of those around them.

Continue reading “Be a Social Leader in One Easy Step”

Five Ways To Get Women To Approach You

This Is Not What I'm Talking About Here’s a question I get all the time: “Hey Scot, how do I know when a woman is interested in me? And how can I get women to approach me first?”

Okay, that’s actually two questions. But you get the point.

Well, we all know that women are typically subtle creatures. They aren’t often going to come whack you upside the melon with a 2×4 and announce, “Hey stoopid…I’m into you.”

On second thought, maybe in certain parts of Brooklyn and/or Queens that could happen. And having gone to school in downtown Filthydelphia, I might have to make an exception there also.

But I digress.

Even though most guys habitually miss women’s subtle indicators of interest, all is not lost. In fact, this post is dedicated to lazy guys everywhere who want to hit the “easy button” and bypass all of the Chick Whispering altogether.

Here, at long last, are five bona-fide ways you can get women to approach you for a change.

Let’s get on with it…

Continue reading “Five Ways To Get Women To Approach You”

The Top Ten Places On Earth To Take A Woman

Paris At Night Rocks We’ve talked before about the importance of going on a “road trip” with someone you’ve met recently and think you might really like.

I’m on record as seeing this as a valid test of compatibility.

But lately, I’ve begun to think that perhaps a friggin’ long flight might be just as good an environment for seeing how well you two really get along as a weekend’s worth of “windshield time”.

Maybe.

If you can combine the two, even better.

With that in mind, here’s my top ten list of the most killer trips on Earth to take with a woman. They’re in no particular order because it’s too tough to decide which is the best. Besides, it depends on the mood you’re in and what time of year it is, right?

Continue reading “The Top Ten Places On Earth To Take A Woman”

Relationship Management: The Leading Man

There’s no shortage of pickup training. In fact, it seems that just about every dating guru out there is puzzling over how to find a new twist on teaching it.

Meanwhile, there is a vast emptiness when it comes to solid information on what is arguably the most significant skill there is when it comes to being effective with women. Ironic, isn’t it?

That skill is relationship management.

Sure, you’ve got to know how to meet a woman before you can build a relationship with her.

But the pickup stage is over in a flash. Relationship management is what makes or breaks your overall success with women. Few would question the importance of getting it right.

But the fact remains that most of us get to the first date and are left with empty pockets when it comes to “what to do next”.

As a result, women drop out of our lives after only a few dates (if that)…and we never even know what happened. For some guys this “revolving door of women” is even more the rule than the exception–many never having been able to hold on to any relationship for more than a month or two, max.

If you can relate to what I’m saying, you know it’s one of the most frustrating feelings imaginable. You are excited about meeting a woman and even more so once you succeed at attracting her. Then…nothing. It all disappears before your very eyes, sometimes in a flash.

Well, that’s all about to change. It’s time to get control and discover how to be a quarterback instead of the waterboy. This is about making your own decisions about how long a woman is going to be in your life…or not.

You’ve been telling me for months that you want to get better at managing your relationships with women…be they multiple or exclusive, long- or short-term. And you’ve been telling me you want to know exactly how to go about dating many women to find one great one.

The Leading Man, to be released on September 13th, will be that complete system for managing relationships–on your terms, and on your timeline.

I’ll be giving you more details shortly. But for now, make sure you are on my newsletter list if this program interests you at all. You can use the form at the bottom of this post to sign up.

This is mission critical because I will be offering a pre-launch discount and a free copy of my forthcoming book Chick Whispering to those on my list exclusively.

Incidentally, Chick Whispering was inspired by The Chick Whisperer podcast and is all about how to understand women and succeed with them as a direct result. And it’s also made of unobtanium between now and 2009…unless you are on my list and get in on the pre-launch offer for The Leading Man.

Be Good,

Scot McKay

Rejection And The Rules Of Approach [Part Two]

As promised in Part One, let me give you an example from my Saturday night.

One group was sitting awkwardly at the bar, in a big circle they made with a bunch of meathead looking guys to their right. I could not tell if they were friends or not.

One other girl looked completely miserable, while her friend was completely coddled by a guy. Yet another girl gave me a huge long up and down look then she went to the bar and was nearly lying on it talking to the bartender.

A second group, well they all had on rings and then their husbands came over.

In another group was a cute bunch of girls who just walked in, and were smiling and laughing.

Now, I was hoping the band would take a break soon because it was simply way too hard to talk. I had surveyed my options, and it was almost like a fun version of “musical chairs”.

So back to group one. They were sitting weirdly at the bar and one guy seemed to have a girlfriend in the group. I said, “Let’s walk around, they are not going anywhere for a bit.”

Now I have no problem approaching a group with guys but I like to study it a bit before deciding on a plan. Basically I look for wedding bands, really drunk guys or girls in the group, or an argumentative group.

Once talking to them, a key I look for is if the girls are kinda interested when talking to them, with matching body language. When I see that, I know I have an opportunity to open the group and basically just begin talking.

Continue reading “Rejection And The Rules Of Approach [Part Two]”

Rejection And The Rules Of Approach [Part One]

Two limiting beliefs come to mind for me in night game, and any time overall, really.

These involve rejection and the so-called rules of approach. Too many times we wrap ourselves up in both of these things with certain stigmas and beliefs and end up adding way too much to the whole thing.

Rejection: In my opinion, rejection is your greatest tool to learn how to move forward. Yet, society shows and tells a different story.

We have seen it, right? Guy goes up to girl, drink is thrown. This is so rare in reality, but guys really do think it will happen.

More realistic is this scenario. Guy talks to girl, girl blows off guy. Guy goes and complains about it to his buddies, they say, “Well you tried.” Guy goes home and feels self pity and complains more…to himself.

Continue reading “Rejection And The Rules Of Approach [Part One]”

Chick Whisperer #23 — BONUS: Meet The Six New Coaches (Plus Special Surprises)

This time I’ve got a special bonus episode of The Chick Whisperer for you.

If you’ve been hanging around here at the blog for the past couple of weeks (i.e. “been around the blog a few times”), you’ve already gotten acquainted with our six newest members of the X & Y Communications Team. Actually, based on the number of e-mails and blog comments we’ve seen so far, I’d say you’re response has been very positive.

With that in mind, the newest show features interviews with all six of the new coaches. Having read their posts, now you’ll get a chance to hear what they’ve got to say in their own words. Along with a brief introduction, you’ll discover where they’ve come from and where they are today with regard to their success with women. Most importantly, you’ll also get their vision of the future–including what they’ll be focusing on in terms of blog posts and even live seminar instruction.

So instead of one co-host this time, I’ve actually got six.

But I’ve also thrown in a few more surprises for you this time ’round, including the formal announcement of the next major X & Y Communications project on relationship management.

There’s also some decidedly edgy stuff at the beginning that you’re probably not used to outta me.

All that’s long for “don’t miss this episode”. Subscribe and download on iTunes using any of the graphics on this post. If you do, please also leave us a review in support of the show if you would. That helps us greatly in the rankings.

If you’re not on iTunes, you can subscribe via the feed here.

Finally if you haven’t already, sign up for the newsletter and get the special bonus video collection called “Coolness Personified” I’ve been mentioning on the show. It’s free, of course.

Be Good,

Scot