Thou Shalt Not “Hold Her Purse For Her”

Has this ever happened to you?

You, as a man, image of masculinity such that you are, are in the company of a woman (as is often the case, we hope). Maybe you are at the mall (as is not often the case, we hope), or some social event, or God forbid a sporting event. Out of nowhere, she turns to you and requests, “Here, hold my purse. I’ll be right back.”

Blindly obliging this request, gentlemen, is The Thing That Must Never Be.

It’s a test. It’s a test not only of your manhood, but of your ability to be manhandled. It could be an unconscious one on her part, but then again it could be a calculated assessment to how well you’ll eventually accept being cuckolded in the not-too-distant future.

Someone said, “Dude, what does ‘cuckolded’ mean?”

Exactly.

To many of you out there, this may seem like a minor issue…or even a hang-up. But I’m telling you, I’ve never seen a man who exhibits the “Big Four” holding some chick’s purse for her. Especially if she’s trying on a few things at The Limited.

I’ve also never seen a woman gaze lovingly and with glowing admiration upon a man who is clutching her purse patiently pending her return.

So don’t feel “obligated” guys. Just say “no”. If she isn’t up to schlepping her purse around, she should have left it home. And if she isn’t understanding of your point of view and/or uses your “lack of cooperation” as a weapon later then consider that a warning message about what a long-term relationship with her looks like.

Ultimately, this is all rolled into “The Reverse Golden Rule” as outlined in last week’s newsletter. You know, “Would I ever do unto someone else what is being done unto me here?”

Let me spell this out. I’m not going to expect Emily to sit with me on a Sunday afternoon and endure a full four quarters. That said, considering I can’t even endure a full four quarters of my Ravens this season maybe that’s a poor example. How about, “Hey, why don’t you and your fresh manicure go out and check the oil in my F-150 real quick?” “What do you mean, ‘I don’t think so’, you mean you can’t figure out something that easy?”

Yeah well, she can figure it out alright. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s a completely unreasonable request.

Were I her, I’d purrrr some offhand response to the effect of, “Why sure, baby. Here…hold my purse for me while I do that.”

Let’s all respect each other’s masculinity and femininity, ladies and gentlemen. Even when it’s at the brief and momentary cost to our own personal convenience.

Got any examples of your own? Let’s hear about them.

Be Good,

Scot
 








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4 Replies to “Thou Shalt Not “Hold Her Purse For Her””

  1. This happened to a friend (you know I’m taken so this isn’t an oblique “friend of a friend” self-reference, LOL):

    He’s with a few friends in the bar, and they chat up a group of attractive ladies. A couple of his friends end up on the dance floor with said ladies, and he ends up talking one-on-one to the last one. She asks him “hey, can you watch my stuff?”

    He thinks she’s going off to the bathroom, and obliges. A few minutes later he spots her on the dance floor, grinding with another man.

    Argh.

  2. That’s the next logical step in the evolutionary process…LOL

    Sorry about your friend.

  3. I was just researching this topic on my own, because I was asked exactly same question just this past weekend. I was asked this question many times before and always had this gut feeling that this it was wrong. This time I just knew it was a shit test, so I immediately refused.

    This is clear as water in situations where there are so many convenient surfaces to place the purse on. There was a table at hands reach and this is a friendly situation, nobody is going to run up and grab it. There was also a clean floor right next to her. There was a couch 3 feet away. I mean if you had to place something somewhere, there was room there.

    All she had to was just put her coat on. And she was like “can you hold my purse?”. I had this WTF look on my face. I said “No, what do I look like?”. She didn’t even seem to mind the answer, as if she was expecting this response. She just asked her girlfriend instead.

  4. Quote: “She didn’t even seem to mind the answer”. Yup. They rarely try to talk you into it. But if they ever do, tell them you’ve got a used oil filter you’ll need them to hang onto for a bit the next time you’re in the garage. LOL

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