Online Dating: My Rant On eHarmony [Video]

A warm welcome to the second video blog in the latest series dealing with Online Dating.

By now, you know that I’m generally a good-natured guy. So I figure that I’ve built enough “emotional capital” with you that I can indulge myself in a good, old-fashioned rant or two now and then.

With that in mind, what better place to turn than eHarmony. (or is that, “eHarm-Me”?)

OK, well…enough of an intro. I’m already getting carried away. I’ll let the video do the talking.

But did I mention that eHarmony actually rejects over 20% of it’s applicants without explanation…after they’ve spent over an hour completing the questionnaire? To me that’s gotta feel kind of like losing a hard-earned Word document to the “blue screen of death” before hitting “save”.

Wait…I have to throw in that if you are a guy under 5’7″ they’ve already predetermined that you’ll get rejected, since–after all–you’re “unmatchable” (read about it here, on eHarmony’s own server under “The Chemistry Factor” section.

Okay, okay. It’s time for the video. Really this time…

 

 

So what are your experiences with eHarmony? Are yours different than mine? Share your point of view by leaving a comment.

At 5’7″, I guess I made the cut (FYI, 5’6″ does indeed get rejected, as noted here).

I was set up with women 2000 miles away who were the exact opposite of what my preferences stated (including smoking habits and spiritual beliefs). In fact, my “potential soulmates” were literally all over the map–literally and figuratively.

So after systematically rejecting my allotment of ten per day (?) for the first few days in a row, I asked customer service about all of this.

The response? “Well,” they said matter-of-factly, “why didn’t you just limit your responses to your own metro area?”

Go figure. When you actually fall for their plaintive exhortation to “not limit your geography…this is your soulmate we’re talking about here!”, what happens? They lead with Sacramento, California and Nampa, Idaho when they actually had “the girl next door” in their back pocket all along. Great.

As it turned out, my “soulmates” in San Antonio didn’t cut it either. The one that was interesting I had already met…on Match.com!

OK, then.

Lest I be branded a “Match.com apologist” by the masses, I’ll give you my “rant” on them next time around! It’s all in good fun.

Be Good,

Scot

 
Emily McKay's Click With Him Program For Women

 








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Click With Him Is Now OFFICIALLY RELEASED!

Product Image For Click With HimFive months in the making, Click With Him has finally been released to the world…specifically, to every sharp woman out there who refuses to settle for mediocrity when it comes to online dating.

And true to form, I’ve been awake since about eleven a.m. yesterday taking care of all the “background” details to make sure Emily’s new program is absolutely top-notch.

It is. That’s an understatement.

Emily has free videos for you when you sign up at www.clickwithhim.com. They’ve all been posted within the last 24 hours, so this is all new information.

In them, she offers a friendly intro…then it’s down to business. She has two videos that give away secrets that (in my educated opinion, as a guy) are about the most powerful online dating ideas for women I’ve ever seen put into words.

She has absolutely got it right…any woman who watches those two videos will be instantly more attractive to the RIGHT kind of guys. I can recognize that immediately. Hell, looking back, women who “got” what Emily’s talking about almost always caught my attention online.

So why is she giving this kind of information away?

I concept is very simple really. Once you hear what Emily has going on in two videos of less than a minute each, you are going to have a very good idea of what the rest of over ten hours of Click With Him magic can do for one’s dating life.

Plus, the truth is I can begin to do Click With Him justice in this blog post. Once you behold every wonder that awaits you (as written on Emily’s web page in all it’s pink glory), it’s going to occur to you: There will never again be a good excuse for a woman not to dramatically increase her online dating success.

Seventeen audio programs, including a complete plan for meeting the guy of your dreams in 30 days or less (backed by a real track record to prove it can be done).

An online profile “makeover” so comprehensive that over an hour of audio and a full-length video program are devoted to it.

How exactly to weed out cheaters. How to find a great guy even if his profile isn’t so great. How to make sure first dates go brilliantly…leading to second dates and more. Special guests, with more to come (did we mention that Click With Him is going to continue to expand, just like VIRTUOSITY for the guys?).

Emily has even figured out how what makes men want to commit to the right woman.

So my advice, for the moment, is to stop reading this blog and get in on all the excitement at Click With Him.

Even if you’re a guy, you should see what Emily is talking about. She’s so right on that any guys’ game would be helped just to soak some of this all in.

Every single program I’ve ever seen with six or eight CDs worth of material has gone for at least double the $97 ticket price for Click With Him . Well, except for Online Dating Domination, but that doesn’t count.

Speaking of Online Dating Domination (and VIRTUOSITY for that matter), I couldn’t allow myself to do a profile makeover video for Emily’s new project without doing the same for my bros.

It isn’t even on the web page yet, but RIGHT NOW you can get a full online profile tutorial video with either program. And yep…I’m making more. Use “xy35off” when you order, compliments of Yours Truly.

Yours Truly,

Scot

P.S. Now I’m taking a nap!

 








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Emily’s New Click With Him Program Launches TOMORROW

Product Image For Click With HimThat’s right, after literally MONTHS in the making, Emily’s new flagship program for women Click With Him is ready for release.

It will be five months to the day since VIRTUOSITY was released to men everywhere who refuse to “settle” for any woman who isn’t of the highest echelon on Earth.

Now, it’s finally time for the ladies out there to have access to the same type of vision.

Having been the “techie” for Emily’s new program (as well as a “featured guest” and occasional interviewer) I have to tell you…she’s really outdone herself.

Yeah, I realize that’s a biased opinion. But after all, I did marry her for all the right reasons, I must say. You know: “Deserve What You Want” and “Never, Ever Settle“.

So yes, absolutely. This chick knows what she’s talking about. Not only is she presenting a full-on deep dive into how to be the kind of amazing women guys can’t wait to commit to (and can I get an “amen” from the brethren to making sure there’s more of them out there?), she’s unveiling literally everything she knows about how to succeed online as a woman. Continue reading “Emily’s New Click With Him Program Launches TOMORROW”

New And Improved: E-mails To The Highest Quality Women Online

In a previous post we considered the art of writing first e-mails to the very sharpest women online. In the case study I chose, the real-world group of targeted women in Los Angeles included actresses, models and even a former world-class gymnast.

Our hero, James, certainly had his work cut out for him. In order to succeed with this echelon of hotties and dominate his metro area, his first e-mails would have to rise to a level above some admittedly serious competition out there in Hollyrock.

Well, based on the input given after the first pass, James has gone back to the drawing board. Read on to find out how things are progressing.

As before, my words are represented in italics. The order in which he wrote the women changed this time, but note that I retained the sequencing convention from last time for easier reference this time.

So let’s take a look, shall we?… Continue reading “New And Improved: E-mails To The Highest Quality Women Online”

Writing First E-mails To The Highest Quality Women Online

What follows is a recent e-mail thread with a gentleman who hired me for an online dating success package.

Having changed names and withheld the original list of hotties’ usernames from Match.com in the LA metro area, I’ve decided to share the information with you for at least three reasons:

1) The women he selected as his “top-choices” were flat-out amazing. one was a former gymnast who was on her native country’s national team. Another two were actresses listed on iMDB. Another two were working (and presumably functioning as well) models. This guy had set the bar WAY up there, and I that.

2) His first blush at composing first e-mails would have caused anyone to blush. Seriously, though, his approach was so much like that of many other guys’ I’d worked with that I recognized it as a “textbook” situation that would benefit a potentially staggering number of guys.


3) As of the writing of this blog post (six days later), his profile and entire approach to online dating communication has already been RADICALLY transformed for the better. He is well on his way to dominating even the fiercely contested Los Angeles, CA Match.com market. Right on, James! (Again, not his real name)

A caveat. You may find my style very direct, especially if you typically think of me as having an easy-going demeanor. Remember, my job is to get results, not be “Mr. Nice Guy”. That said, my passion is to help guys just like James deserve what they want…and really, truly get it.

You already know I’m not “for entertainment purposes”. It’s all business. The good news is that straight-talk makes a huge difference in shortening lead time between “newbie” stage and online dating domination.

So see if any of this serves you well. Fasten your seat belts, here we go…. Continue reading “Writing First E-mails To The Highest Quality Women Online”

Step Two To An Online Profile That Stands Out [Part Two Of Two]

In part one of this series we discovered a major reason why most people have boring, generic online profiles. Simply put, we do what we’re told. When asked to write “About me and who I’m looking for” (a la Match.com), that’s exactly what we do.

As in–that’s what all of us do, it seems.

So as mentioned last time, we already know that you can dramatically increase your online profile’s effectiveness by rephrasing the questions more interestingly.

But I promised yet another killer way to make your profile read differently. And this one is used by so few people out there that you will instantly separate yourself from the herd should you try what I’m about to tell you.

You see, the inherent problem is that the profile narrative is a writing assignment…literally. Filling it out reminds us–at best–of completing a job application.

And at worst, it feels a lot like writing an “essay” did back in junior high.

So subconsciously, many of us write as if we’re going to be graded. It’s almost as if someone at Match.com has a big red pen ready to scrawl disparaging notes in the virtual margin of our profiles.

Either that or, well…some people just never were all that good with essays at all so they’re starcrossed from step one. If you can’t spell, punctuate and/or agree in gender, number and case…well then you’re hurtin’ for certain.

And let’s face it…MOST of us (except for the freakish weirdos amongst us who think blogging is fun) really don’t look forward to writing “essays” anyway.

So what to do? After all, without a killer profile narrative you’re online presence suffers in a big way.

Well you could hire me to write something for you. But the problem is that I don’t do “profile rewrites”.

I do, however, teach men and women how to transform their mediocre profiles into expressions of greatness. All the time.

You see, were I to write your blasted “essay” for you the real problem might actually be exacerbated rather than helped.

Why?

Simple. Because whether I write your profile or you write it yourself with your head lost in “Sixth Grade Essayland” the issue is the same: It just flat-out won’t be YOU TALKING.

As much time as I spend writing stuff, I am no match for YOUR authentic self. And for that matter, neither is your mindset when lapsing into how you were trained as a child to compose theme papers.

The solution?

What you do instead of WRITING your profile at all is…you SPEAK your profile. Because when you SPEAK, your true self is portrayed.

If you have a digital voice recorder around the house, you’re all set. If you don’t, they’re about $60 retail (for a really good one, at that). Fortuitously, the chances are even pretty good that your mobile phone has a voice recorder feature.

Speak what you want to express in your profile narrative into the voice recorder. Then transcribe it. That’s all.

And don’t let me catch you making a “crib sheet” with notes scrawled on it. In order for this exercise to make sense, you must start only with general thoughts in your head rather than hardcopy notes or some memorized “lines”.

Speak from the heart. Remember how you rephrased the “essay question” itself (as talked about in Part One) and talk to those thoughts.

As retarded as it sounds, if you want to talk to a friend while you record or even pull up the profile of someone you potentially like and talk to it, go for it. Then again, if talking into thin air with your eyes glazed over does it for you, so be it. Whatever puts you into the flow.

When you are through, play it all back and write it down as you spoke it…COMPLETE with the “you knows” and “I’ll tell you whats”. Use the spell checker and by all means punctuate appropriately, but don’t correct your “grammar” or the wordsmithing itself. If you can upload the digital file to your computer as an MP3 and pause it as it plays that’s even better. If it’s kind of long, you can even use freeware like Audacity to edit it before you write. You have options.

My educated guess is that your profile narrative–when completed–will sound exactly like YOU talking. Probably because it IS you talking…duh.

And it will stand out from the sea of generic wannabes without a doubt.

Your responses will go up because your profile narrative will be REAL. You won’t have to write crap like “no games” because you’ve already DEMONSTRATED that concept. in real-time. Fantastic stuff.

And when you actually meet someone, you’ll not have to worry that you’ll seem completely different in real life than you did in your profile. Sure the pics will have to match also, but you already know that.

Go and give this a try and email me your success stories at scot@datetoorder.com.

Online Dating Domination...Forget The 'Numbers Game' And Meet The Ones You Really Want
BTW, if you are a guy there’s 11.5 hours MORE targeted strategy on how to dominate your metro area for you in the Online Dating Domination program. It takes a strategy that’s tight as a drum to call your own shots online, but it can absolutely be done…and in less time than you think. If online dating is frustrating you, imagine how it would feel to write women you actually WANT TO MEET…and HEAR BACK FROM THEM more often than not. What would your social life look like if you were able to harness online dating into being your tool like that…rather than vice-versa?

Emily's Click With Him Program Has Been A Long Time Coming
And ladies, after literally months of work Emily is very, very close to releasing her brand-new program called Click With Him. We literally have the very last of 17 audio programs in the editing stage, and if you click the link above you can check out the basics already and even pre-order. Among what she has in store is a 30-Day Plan To Finding A Great Man Online (which she can back up) and a full-scale top-secret session on how to become the kind of woman a man wants to commit to. Believe me when I tell you there’s something to what she talks about.

Emily even had me sit down and spill how to spot great men behind mediocre profiles. Hey…not every guy reads this blog, let alone has Online Dating Domination on his iPod, okay?

I’ll be talking again to you soon…literally. Then next post will be video.

Be Good,

Scot
 








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Step One To An Online Profile Narrative That Stands Out [Part One Of Two]

Ever notice how people tend to say the exact same stuff in online dating profiles?

Seriously, if it isn’t the same tired chorus of “I don’t want to play games” or “friends first”, then it’s what I unaffectionately refer to as “Comma Chameleon Syndrome”. This is where someone (man or woman, really) proceeds to spew forth a comma-delimited list of literally everything he or she can think of to describe him or herself. Typically, when considered as a whole, the list paints a picture of that person as pretty much whomever you’d like for them to be. Like a chameleon, this person’s “true colors” are clearly (or is that “unclearly”?) subject to change.

So why is it that everyone seems to follow such a generic “formula” for writing a profile? Seriously…virtually nobody stands out from the crowd, even though instinctively most of us know doing so can dramatically increase online dating success.

Well, the simple fact that the exercise is called a “narrative” in online-dating speak (I’ve even seen a dating site or two refer to it as an “essay”…crazy) tends to put people in the same frame of mind as they were back in elementary school. And when a writing task is approached more as an “assignment” than a creative expression, what tends to result is very much like unto what you see on the typical online dating “essay”, huh?

I believe there’s a secondary issue that compounds this state of affairs even further. Namely, the instructions to the online dater on how to fill out the “narrative” section are wrong-headed.

On Match.com, for example, the only description for the section when confronted with filling it out reads “About me and who I’m looking for”.

My theory is that–again, like what we were all taught back in grade school–people simply do what they’re told.

We’ve all been trained to “follow directions” and to “be objective” when it comes to writing assignments. And for Heaven’s sake, one simply must follow proper paragraph structure and whatever. If your school experience was anything like mine, you’d otherwise be hit with “VAGUE” and “INEFFECTIVE” scrawled in red ink all over your “essay” when it was returned to you.

So then, what do we do on those profiles of ours?

We write a litany of things that describe us. And then we write a litany of things to describe some third-party whom we are allegedly “looking for”, as if we’ve lost our puppy and are making posters to wallpaper the neighborhood with.

If your head, you already know that talking about yourself (especially in list form) is B-O-R-I-N-G to MOTOS (Members Of The Opposite Sex) when you’re out on dates. Guess what? Nothing’s different in this context.

And who is going to be inspired by a generic list of bullet points when it comes to “who you’re looking for?”

Once you begin to see exactly why we tend to write such boring profiles, you can quickly determine the solution: Break the blasted rules.

That’s right, instead of blind obedience to the given format, why not try rephrasing the objective in a whole new way?

Instead of “About me”, try thinking of the concept as: “What sets me apart as especially attractive” or even, “Why you will be attracted to me”. I particularly like the second option because it’s positioned in the second person. When you have a particular person in mind whom you are addressing, the free-form section of your profile can’t help but improve.

And that goes double when it comes time to rephrase “Who I’m looking for”. Have a particular person in mind–even dare I say someone whose profile interests you quite a bit–and write to that person. Put “one-itis” phobia on the shelf for now and treat this as an objective exercise designed to get you results. Then, write to the thought of “What your life will be like after we meet”, or “What the person I’m wild about is really like.” Lookit, you can rest assured that the finished product in such case, when written out, will be more inspiring and hella more positive than a list of traits or “dos and don’ts”, right?

So that’s a simple but highly-effective strategy for combating “generic” profiles. Although somewhat obvious when you think about it, almost nobody deviates from “following directions”. Be a trail-blazer and watch your responses increase noticeably.

But what of the related issue about writing our narratives as if we’re composing a 6th grade theme-paper? I’ve got that issue covered in a way that will blow your socks off…next time.

Meanwhile, for over NINE HOURS of practical online dating strategy that can help you become more successful online than any other guy in your metro area (for real) be sure to check out Online Dating Domination. By the way, Emily’s new online dating program for women, called Click With Him, is coming very, very soon.

Be Good,

Scot
 








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