Men Attracting Women – Page 2 – The Official Blog Of Scot McKay

7 Bad-To-The-Bone Skills That Women Love

Get Your Game On I’m not sure what it is lately, but I’ve been getting more than my fair share of e-mails from guys saying something to the effect of this:

“But Scot, I’m incredibly useless/boring/average and there’s nothing about me that a woman would be attracted to, especially compared to other guys out there.”

My knee-jerk reaction is to encourage men who think that way to stop comparing themselves to others and take control over their circumstances instead. Thankfully, we can DO SOMETHING to change the way things are if we just don’t feel like we’ve got a whole lot to offer a woman. That’s what deserving what you want is all about.

But I have to be honest with you. My knee-jerk reaction has to yield to a gut-level hunch in this case. That’s this: I’d be willing to bet that you ALREADY HAVE some pretty badass skills in your toolbox. The problem is that you simply aren’t leveraging them.

Here are seven examples of common skills that thrill women to no end. You may already possess some of these, but the reason I’ve selected them in particular is because they can be acquired with a modicum of effort:

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Do You “Take Yourself Too Seriously”?

The Ministry Of Silly Walks I’m going to level with you on this one. Part of why I’m writing this particular blog post is because I want to force myself to finally come to grips with a subject that I’ve always thought I understood—at least in principle—but lately am not so sure I REALLY, TRULY get.

That would be the whole, widely celebrated idea of “taking oneself less seriously”.

Perhaps ironically, this means I’m about to take the topic seriously, for once. Just in case your head is about to explode already, let’s rephrase that: I’m really in the mood to get down to the bottom of it all, especially as it pertains to interpersonal relationships.

No doubt, every single time “taking oneself LESS seriously” is talked about it’s positioned as a GOOD thing. Following logically, “taking oneself TOO seriously” is universally positioned as a BAD thing.

But rather than be sheep and follow the herd, doesn’t it behoove us (sheep have hooves, get it?) to first explore what’s so bad about being “serious” about oneself?

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Stop Chasing, Start Choosing: Take Control Of Your Dating Life, Get The Women You Truly Want

Women Made Easy

Subject: Turn Fantasy Into Reality

Have you somehow been led to believe that women hold ALL the power when it comes to male/female relationships?

It’s true that the hottest ones are approached dozens of times per day by eager men who want to be with them.

It’s as if a desirable woman can casually CHOOSE from all of those guys who CHASE after her, most of whom are desperately clamoring for just one chance.

There’s no doubt who’s got the upper hand there. But what if I told you that wielding that kind of power in the dating world is NOT necessarily gender-specific?

What few men EVER figure out is that they can–and SHOULD–have the power position when meeting women, and yes…even when building relationships with them.

Yes, YOU can be the chooser instead…and that’s actually how women WANT it. Think about it…have you noticed that NONE of those needy guys who CHASE after women ever end up with the hottest ones?

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Seducing Wild Alaska: The Truth About Male/Female Ratios Up There

There's At Least One Hottie Out There Climbing The Glaciers We’ve been in Alaska for the past two weeks.

For real. In fact, we just got back two nights ago and we’ve pretty much been catching up on sleep since.

Now, you’ve probably noticed that like one out of four shows on the Discovery or National Geographic channels have something to do with Alaska. Usually, they refer to it as “Wild Alaska”, or something similar.

Well, if you’ve been there you don’t need me to tell you that it lived up to the hype. Whether we were hiking glaciers in Kennicott, powering through the Kenai Fjords along with a pod of Dall’s Porpoises or hauling ass up the infamous Dalton Highway toward the Arctic Circle and beyond, Alaska was nothing short of an amazing and glorious adventure at every turn.

But to me, the WILDEST thing about Alaska was something completely different…and something wholly unexpected.

You see, I’ve been hearing from guys who actually LIVE in Alaska for years now. They all say the same thing over and over:

“But Scot, I don’t have a girlfriend and the problem is that I live in Alaska. There are like 50 guys for every woman here. I have no chance with odds like that! The competition is too much to overcome.”

Having received probably fifty e-mails like that but never having been to The Last Frontier myself, you can imagine what I expected to see once we touched down at Ted Stevens Int’l, grabbed our luggage and caught a ride to the hotel.

Both Emily and I had been led to believe we’d encounter a veritable Armistice Day Parade of buff, interesting, “Marlboro Man” types interrupted only occasionally by some pasty, unappetizing chick named “Large Marge” in a 4×4 pickup truck with “Halliburton” on the side.

Instead, the reality was nothing short of SHOCKING.

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Do You Really Have A “Porn Problem”?

Seductive, Isn't It? What I’m about to share with you comes after months of consideration, countless conversations with real guys everywhere and yes…a final decision that despite how controversial my thoughts are going to be to some, this post really NEEDS to be written.

Here’s the thing. I get a lot of messages from guys on the subject of porn.

Typically, they’re worried that they have a very real problem in their life because they’re watching it. They wonder if it’s scarring them for life, disjointing their views of women or even “robbing them of masculine power”. They’re concerned that if any woman they ever go out with finds out about it, she’ll drop them like a hot potato.

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Women Made Easy: What They Do, Why They Do It And How To Be A Man About It

Women Made Easy

Subject: A Dirty, Messy But Absolutely Thrilling Journey Into The Female Mind

What if… you could rise above the frustrated, confused ranks of men all over the world who are convinced women are impossible to understand?
In other words, what if you finally figured them out? For real…

By that I mean legitimately knowing what thoughts are going through their heads, why they do what they do, and best of all how to handle it all like a man.

Can you imagine how profound an advantage that would be? Women would flat-out adore you, connecting with you in an almost supernatural way–even as you wield more personal power in their presence than ever before.

Well, I’ve been literally immersed in the art and science of understanding women for over a decade. During that time I’ve empowered tens of thousands of average men to achieve way better than average results with the opposite sex.

And having been bombarded with questions from men all over the world who are completely nonplussed by what women say and what they do, I’ve come out with a killer new book on Amazon that answers them ALL. Check it out…it’s already a #1 bestseller in two categories within 24 hours of its official release:

http://www.womenmadeeasy.com/getthebook

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That New Bud Light Commercial Where They’re On A First Date

If you’ve been watching the NCAA tournament at all this year, you’ve probably already seen this commercial about three dozen times:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMExuin6U-c

Considering that it centers around a first date between two people who’ve met online, I figured it would be fun to talk about it some…especially since I haven’t broken down any TV commercials around here lately.

So let’s get into it.

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7 Clues That You’re Being Too Picky

Be Selective, Not Picky If you’ve been reading this blog and/or my newsletters for some time, you already know how much I tend to harp on “settling”.

Essentially, I firmly believe that we shouldn’t allow ourselves to get into a long-term relationship with ANYONE who isn’t really who we want.

That’s all well and good.

But a couple of days ago, someone wrote in and basically asked this:

“Okay, smart guy. It’s loud and clear by now that I shouldn’t ‘settle’. But wait a minute, Trigger. How am I supposed to know if I’m being TOO picky?”

Interesting. On the surface, one’s knee-jerk reaction might be to assume that if “settling” is such a dirty, forbidden state of affairs then there would theoretically not be any such thing as being “too picky”.

But as it turns out, you really CAN cross the line if you’re not careful.

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8 Signs Your Girlfriend Doesn’t Respect You Enough

I Get No Respect...No Respect At All. If the subject line of this post grabbed your attention, it’s probably because you’ve been there before.

You were crazy about a particular woman, and what do you know? She actually went out with you. What’s more, she actually became your girlfriend.

Maybe she was even as hot for you as you were for her…at least at first.

But over time, as things became more, shall we say, “familiar”, you started getting the sneaking suspicion that she was sort of taking you for granted.

In fact, you got the feeling that she fully expected you to stick around forever regardless of what she did or didn’t do for you.

She had clearly grown complacent. She had gotten used to keeping you around without having to exert much effort.

You just weren’t much of a “challenge” anymore.

And you know what? I realize this is going to sting a bit…but that can only mean she was losing respect for you.

That’s right. You’ve heard of the “Just Be Friends Zone”? Well, you had been banished to the “No Respect Zone”. And as you probably found out, it’s every bit as deep a pit to climb out of.

Now, before you start throwing rocks at your computer monitor and/or slam your iPad to the floor, here are eight ways to tell if what I’m bring up here really applies to you or not.

That’s right. I’ve identified a total of eight quick signs that a woman is losing respect for you—or has completely lost it already:

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5 Ways Dating Has Benefited From Modern Technology

We've Come A Long Way, Baby... Having driven over 2000 miles so far on our first annual “International Fall Road Trip” Emily and I have had plenty of time to come up with weird topics of conversation. Especially while driving through Missouri and Indiana late at night.

One such discussion centered around how modernity has affected dating relationships. Needless to say, there was a lot to talk about…a lot of it well worth sharing with you.

For the purposes of this post, though, I’m going to limit the scope to technical advances of the last 25 years or so. There’s no doubt that wondrous inventions like the automobile, motion pictures and heck, deodorant, have done wonders for the dating fortunes of millions. But geez, if you go back that far “dating” as we commonly know it didn’t even exist (although beer did). Nevertheless, I’ve got to draw the line somewhere.

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Pushing Each Other’s “Hot Buttons”

The Big Red Monster We’re all familiar with the whole concept behind “hot buttons”. Usually, when the topic comes up in conversation it’s in the context of complete exasperation. Some people really just know how to set us off…and the craziest part is that it’s typically the people we know best.

If you grew up with siblings, that was likely your initiation into this whole reality…whether your buttons were being pressed or you were doing the pressing.

Personally, I was the oldest of three by five and seven years respectively. Geez, did my kid brother and sister ever know exactly how to make me mad.

And given the fact that they generally got away with their shenanigans while I got blamed for whatever mayhem ensued made things all that much worse for me and hilarious for them.

Yep…they knew exactly what buttons to push in order to get the desired (i.e. highly entertaining) results.

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Top 10 Songs That Are Guaranteed To Make Her Hot For You

This Is Only How It Starts... I was recently asked during a media interview what my favorite “love song” was.

My first “knee jerk” reaction was, well…NO reaction.

I mean, I’m a guy. Who asks a dude a question like that and expects an answer any different than, say, “Let’s Get Drunk And Screw” by Jimmy Buffett? I mean, it’s just begging for a sarcastic retort, at best.

But your boy–being the mature type such that I am–took the high road. I asked for a few seconds to think about my answer, and I gave one. It was a REAL good one, actually (see #1 below).

And the more I thought about it, the more I came to the realization that all of as guys really should give more thought to that question. It really is an excellent idea to have some really amazing “love songs” in mind…you know, should the need for one ever arise.

Here’s the thing though. I suspect that a lot of y’all are like me. You hear the term “love song” and immediately think of something sappy and wussified like “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt or “She’s So High” by Tal Bachman.

Heck, even most of the old Motown classics like “Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch” and “Ain’t Too Proud To Beg” are lame because they’re needy as all get out (whatever that means).

But hold your horses, my brethren.

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Is It A Bad Thing For Couples To Argue?

Enjoy The Argument...Especially The Part Where You Make Up At The End If you’re like me, you’ve seen your fair share of couples talking on TV or whatever about how happily married they are.

Maybe they’ve been blissfully married 50 years, etc., etc.

Have you ever noticed how often they talk about how LITTLE they’ve argued over the years?

I mean, my own parents have rarely—if ever—argued with each other, at least in front of us, their offspring. And yes, they truly have been blissfully married for over 50 years.

I’ve really never met two people who agree on most everything the way they do.

For what it’s worth, the foundations of what I’ve learned about what a great relationship should look like were formed at a very young age. My parents have always been a shining example of that.

But hold on a second.

Despite the evidence I’ve seen at home and on TV, is how much or how little a couple argues really ALWAYS such an effective barometer of “relationship health” as we’ve blindly given it credit for being all these years?

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What The Heck Is A Man’s “Feminine Side”, Anyway?

What Does 'Getting In Touch With Your Feminine Side' Mean?
First of all, before we get into this you have to know how impossible it was to find a decent pic to go along with this post. Just about every potential image I initially thought would be clever turned out to be nothing short of creepy.

Maybe there’s no coincidence there. Perhaps talking about men as having a “feminine side” is inherently creepy to begin with, it’s just that nobody dares say anything because the idea of “getting in touch with one’s feminine side” has become such a cliché over the years.

And like most clichés, people tend to use that particular one conveniently when it seems to fit the situation…without really giving much thought to it.

But what in the world does it MEAN for a man to “get in touch with his feminine side”? And is it a good thing to do so? Geez…do we even HAVE a “feminine side”?

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10 Simple Tests Of Whether You’re A Wimp Or Not

By now you know all too well that being a “wuss” is not attractive to women at all.

The very essence of what ignites femininity is directly tied to facing fear with courage, coming up with a plan when crisis hits and being a protector when danger and uncertainty loom.

And, well…you just can’t be ANY of those things if you’re a “scaredy-cat”, now can you?

Most of us will never be faced with storming Bin Laden’s camp in Pakistan, landing an airliner in the Hudson River or fending off a pack of wild tigers in the Sri Lankan jungle.

That’s all well and good, but you WILL need to be able to get through normal, everyday life in post-modern culture.

For better or worse, life in that context really does present nearly constant challenges to “man up”…even if they’re small or even subtle ones.

Nevertheless, you can bet your bottom dollar that women are watching.

With that in mind, I hereby present to you ten very basic, simple tests to tell with almost 100% certainty what kind of man you are.

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The Weird Pattern To Questions We Get

Given what Emily and I do for a living, as you imagine we’ve probably heard just about everything.

And truly, there’s no limit to the potential topics of discussion when it comes to matters of men relating to women and vice-versa.

Maybe that’s why it’s so blasted curious to me that about a quarter to a third of the questions we get follow a certain pattern.

It’s a very definable one, too. Here are just a few examples. See if you can pick up on what I’m talking about:

“Hey Scot, lately I’ve been completely unmotivated and even scared to ask a few women out. Yet they seem to flirt with me all the time. Should I man up and flirt back, or am I doomed to never having a girlfriend? Thanks, man.”

“Yo man, whenever I meet girls I try to ‘escalate’ as quickly as possible so I can ‘get the lay’. But the same thing always happens—they always tell me I’m a little too ‘intense’ for them and that they don’t want to go out with me. Should I stop pushing for sex so soon?”

And then there’s this sort of thing…which is way, way too common:

“Hello Scot and Emily. I live with my boyfriend, but he leaves me alone for most of the night and when he comes home drunk beats the heck out of me. He doesn’t have a job and spends most of what little I make on cocaine and gambling. Oh, and he slaps my two children around also and calls them names. Should I marry him?”

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Three Little Words (No…Not THOSE Three Little Words)

It was my oldest daughter who started it.

Back when she was about two she started saying, “I like you” to me.

Of course, we told her we loved her all the time.

But she was the one to take the initiative to take things a step further. Even though she was so young, she recognized that saying “I like you” is different than saying “I love you”.

Upon first consideration, you may perhaps think of “I like you” as somehow junior to its heavier “I love you” relative.

Indeed, many of us think of—and even joke about—“I like you” as kind of “ILY Lite”, possibly reserved for when someone we’re dating drops the “ILY” bomb on us before we’re exactly willing or ready to reciprocate.

Her: “I love you.”

Him: “Uh…I, um…LIKE you too.”

While I fully get the dynamics of such an unfortunate conversation, I think it’s a mistake to automatically relegate “I like you” to the realm of the relatively trivial.

That’s because when used effectively, the phrase can convey as much, if not MORE power than “I love you” can.

Even at age two, my daughter realized that.

The secret to making “I like you” count is using it proactively instead of reactively.

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Thank You For Your Contribution To Limiting Global Population Growth

[Ed. Note: Fair warning, what you are about to read is a mostly
satirical piece. You’re going to need to activate your sense of
humor before proceeding.]

Hey you know, with the global population now estimated to be at
about six-and-a-half billion (and growing), it’s become critical
that we as a human race do SOMETHING to keep the population from
exploding at an even greater rate than it has been lately.

What with people living something like twice as long on average as
they did roughly a century ago, the need for this is even more
apparent…as anyone can plainly see.

The formula I propose goes something like this:

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About FHM’s New List Of The “100 Sexiest Women In The World”

FHM's List, Not Mine Several days ago FHM released their annual list of the women their editors consider to be the 100 sexiest on Earth.

The key words in that last sentence were “their editors consider”.

As is typically the case when FHM, Maxim and/or AskMen publish lists like this, the comments pour in by the bucketload…mostly from guys who are shocked and appalled by some of the choices. Invariably, they also have a few ideas of their own on who should have been included.

As for me? I pretty much take it for what it is–an opinion piece–and move on. I mean, this latest FHM list was released five days ago and I just now figured that out…accidentally.

But I do think there is one MAJOR takeaway available from lists like this: The truth is that even if some magazine considers a certain woman to be among the 100 hottest on Earth, there’s someone else out there who thinks she doesn’t deserve to be on the list.

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