Thank You For Your Contribution To Limiting Global Population Growth



[Ed. Note: Fair warning, what you are about to read is a mostly
satirical piece. You’re going to need to activate your sense of
humor before proceeding.]

Hey you know, with the global population now estimated to be at
about six-and-a-half billion (and growing), it’s become critical
that we as a human race do SOMETHING to keep the population from
exploding at an even greater rate than it has been lately.

What with people living something like twice as long on average as
they did roughly a century ago, the need for this is even more
apparent…as anyone can plainly see.

The formula I propose goes something like this:

1) Let’s “empower” women with the notion that anything and
everything “masculine” is what’s really responsible for all the bad
in the world. At the same time, let’s empower them to believe that
they can do no wrong (ever) and that men should therefore logically
give them whatever they want.

That way men will not only instinctively stop being men, they’ll
gladly grovel to women without any shame or excuse whatsoever. As
a direct result, no woman in her right mind could ever possibly be
sexually attracted to these now “neutered” creatures. Without
sexual attraction…voila…no babies!

2) Let’s institute a culture of “sexual harassment training”.
Gather all the men into the room and brainwash them into believing
that women want to be left alone by them at all times, and under no
circumstances should they EVER indicate any kind of sexual interest
in them.

Violations (even if implied and unsubstantiated) will be punishable
by termination, lawsuit and perhaps even criminal prosecution
(followed by a prison term and permanent registration as a “sex
offender”).

3) Just for good measure, let’s institute the policy that ANY
woman who demonstrates—even subtly—that she’s a “sexual creature”
should be branded a “slut”, immediately and irrevocably. The swift
penalty for any infraction (even if brought about by a third-party
accusation on, say, Facebook) would be total loss of all social
status as a “respectable” person.

There you go. That should do the trick.

And HA…just look at the simplicity of it all. By taking those
simple steps we’ll have completely eliminated any chance that a
red-blooded male human being would EVER dare show sexual interest
in a woman.

And elegantly, in one fell swoop we’ll also have put to rest any
worry that any “self-respecting” female human being would take
matters into her own hands and actually initiate the dreaded
baby-making ritual herself.

Heck, by confusing what in the world ever actually instigated
“sexual polarity” back in the day we’ll soon do away with any
intelligent recognition by anyone of what they’re even missing out
on.

It’s the perfect storm, I tell you.

But wait…here’s the startling part. Not to drop a bomb on you or
anything, but I’m all but sure that there’s ALREADY a global
strategy in place that “Big Brother” has been using to do his level
best at accomplishing all that’s necessary here for the last thirty
or forty years…and it looks shockingly like the blueprint I laid
out above.

And I can tell you with reasonable certainty that it’s been
reasonably successful…at least here in the “civilized” world.

Yet, for some reason all of the “third world” countries out there
that haven’t been “enlightened” to the fact that masculinity and
femininity are nothing more than evil cultural memes designed to
ruin people’s lives continue to manufacture babies at alarming
rates…go figure.

If’n they could only have the wherewithal to organize and afford
more “sexual harassment seminars”. And if they weren’t so
“backwards”, failing to grasp a “modern” view of a woman’s
inalienable right not to be “bothered” by natural male/female
flirtation.

But whatever…

All that aside, I just want to take this opportunity to THANK YOU.

Thank you for being more evolved and civilized than your ancestors.

As a card-carrying member of 21st-century “first world” culture,
thank you for so willingly falling in line with the “master
strategy”.

Even with all those women out there frustrated to the hilt by the
millions of men out there who “fail to deploy”, you’re still a nice
enough guy not to even so much as approach them and start a simple
conversation.

The booming, multi-gazillion dollar women’s “sex toy” industry
thanks you as well…along with all those upwardly-mobile “Slumber
Parties” hostesses who can now warmly believe they’re doing society
a valid service by “replacing you” (sort of, they guess).

Oh, and the booming, multi-gazillion dollar porn industry thanks
you for your undying support also.

And hey, we as men should thank THEM.

After all, we’re left with this pesky, nagging matter of the
physiological need for sexual release. Who needs a real, live
woman anyway? They’ll probably just take all of our money and go
shoe shopping anyway.

But most of all, THANK YOU for your valuable contribution to
curtailing global population explosion. Without ever talking to
women at all, it’s all but certain you’ll never get around to
making any children. The world is now “safe”.

Be Good,

Scot McKay

P.S. If what you just read caused the hair on the back of your
neck to stand on end, that makes both of us. I felt like freaking
Stephen King writing it…sheesh.

Back here in the “real world”, rest assured I’m all about
empowering you to boldly attract women. Leave all of that passive
denial of masculine/feminine polarity and “fear of deployment” to
some other poor sucker who’s been easily led.

Every single day I see more and more evidence that today’s women
are absolutely STARVING for real men to show up and sweep them off
their feet.

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3 Replies to “Thank You For Your Contribution To Limiting Global Population Growth”

  1. It’s really crazy how many people have grown to accept that “Yes, Dear!” and “Everybody Loves Raymond,” mentality when it comes to relationships.

    Sex is put on a pedestal and something a man is “allowed,” to have IF he’s been “good.” It’s guarded from a women’s standpoint as not to promote uncouthness and “slutiness” on her part.

    All the while this type of behavior is the biggest attraction killer and hinders a healthy standpoint on sexuality between partners.

    We’re sent and taught these mixed-messages that completely go against the laws of nature.

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